Monday morning poem

This one was written by Gwen herself

What happens when you try to write a poem using the phrases:
Double Breasted Suit
California Newt
Banana Passion Fruit
and
House of ill repute?
Not much.


The California Newt:

Where for a'going Mister Ketch in his double breasted suit?

Well going down that road ya see their can't be no depute.

When dressed up in is finery just like an ostrich goes

Mister Ketch is fetch-en up to the onliest place where sin and pleasure grows

They gave that Ketch a nicking name on account of his slimy ways

like a lizard down in Santa Fe a slinkn' through the days

California Newt they call him, as hes slinkn' through the town

and with the whiskey and that whine, my man, tis a wonder he don't drown!

Yes my fren' as sure he is as what a lady'd call a brute

for Mister Ketch is headed to a house of ill repute!!

As you can see I was trying to make it sound all "country-ish" like two old men with banjos sitting in rocking chairs. I also couldn't fit Banana Passion Fruit anywhere!!

Do you have a challenge for me?

thus ends NaNoWriMo

I have greatly underestimated the difficulty of writing. I didn't understand the effort you writers put into your work.

I believe I made the 312 word mark before giving up in utter dismay. I was attempting to run a marathon without ever training.

Poetry and an occasional blog post did not prepare me sufficiently to write a novel. Really writting is hard work.

I solute you, writers of the world, you guys are truly amazing.

Wednesday Love: Shakiera

I am RATHER FOND of Shakiera

Her music is happy, exotic, and boosts my self-esteem.
How? I have no idea. It probaly should do the opposite considering her content and dance moves. Yet she is able to share her sexyness with others unlike, say, Britney Spears.

I'm Listening to "Whenever, Wherever" at this very moment. Check it out

How to thrift store shop

Just because you're poor doesn't mean you shouldn't shop. Here is a quick tutorial on how to thrift store shop (or shop anywhere really).

Starting out:
1. Choose larger thrift shops. I love smaller stores, but it is so much more difficult to find anything, save your tiny, local shops for a boring day.
2. Shop in lower-income areas. Not only will they be cheaper, but novelty "hipster" like stuff is way less picked over.
Caution! Lock your doors, look where your going etc.., always be aware of your surroundings.

What to take:
3. Dress simply, but cute. Wear a lot of staples, for instance, I wear jeans, a tank and a cover-up vest that I wear with alot of different things. This way I know immediately what, say a sweater, will look like when I bring it home. but make sure its something you feel pretty in. Flip-Flops are best for dressing rooms, but I wear sneakers b/c I hate flip-flops, if you like them, go for it!
4. Wash your hair, put on makeup. Whats the big deal? We're going to a crummy part of town, not on a date! But remember, you are about to spend a bunch of time in front of a mirror. You want to look your best so you can concentrate on the Clothing. Wear your hair up, and smile!
5. Don't bring much. I bring my phone, my wallet, and my keys. That's it. I put these in a small sling purse. Jewelry is a pain, scarves and hats are going to loose their charm about the thirty minutes in. You NEVER want to be digging through your purse at thrift shops....
I also put rubbing alcohol in my car, you don't know where those clothes have been.
6. Have a basic list of what you are looking for. But don't count on anything. you never, ever know what you'll find.

Once you arrive:
7. Look for all entrances and exits and locate any sketchy characters. This may be a bit extreme, but you want to be able to shop in peace.
8. Start from the bottom up. and look at stuff before clothing, shoes before pants. Etc.. Get everything that doesn't involve the dressing room done, I know that once I get out of that room I will want to be finished.
9. Pick stuff that fits. Sorry I have to say this, I do it too. I find the absolute perfect dress, but its a size too small. BAD IDEA. Do not try it on. Put it back. Remind yourself that there will always be beautiful things that don't fit you, big or small.
10. Don't be afraid to leave. Sometimes it is just time to be done...even if you haven't seen every section.

In the dressing room:
11. Pretend your in the Olympics. Get in and get out AS FAST AS YOU CAN. I give myself about fifteen seconds per item. If it doesn't go over your head don't bother.
12. Beware DIY-ers. Its natural to want to rescue every thing you find. (oh if I took the waist in a little and added trim here etc...). Use the Cost-per-wow ratio. If its a dolor and only needs to be hemmed. Grab that puppy. If it costs eight and needs more than an hour of work, forget it! you have enough to do.

Miscellaneous:
13. Things shrink. and warp and fray. IF it should fit and doesn't don't freak. Remind yourself that you are not defined by a number.
14. Have an adventure. each store is different, they categorize differently, and stock different brands. Don't treat it like shopping at Khols. It simply won't work
15. Wash everything before you wear it.

One last caution:
If you are feeling ugly, super tired, or need a very particular item, do yourself and your loved ones a favor and go to Pennies. Thrift-ing is not for the faint of heart or the impatient. Save it for another day

Otherwise, happy shopping and
Good luck!

Wonderful self-esteem video

Wednesday Love: Poetry

I LOVE Poetry.

I do

Writing it, reading it

It is the gutsiest thing that I do on a regular basis. And I have friends who really send their stuff to publishers on a regular basis. I find it amazing just to put it on facebook:)

My personal favorites:
Ogden Nash
A. A. Milne
Gwendolyn Bracknell

NaNoWriMO

Are you up to a challenge? Board with your hum-drum existence?
Do you love writing. Or have a bucket list?

Join me on an adventure of a life time!....er month time!

National Novel Writing Month

Basically you write a novel in one month, starting November first and ending November thirtieth. There is no quality check, just word count. And if you win you get bragging rights and a banner to put on your blog/facebook etc....

Are you with me?

Wensday Love: Shane Claiborne

I LOVE Shane Claiborne!

First of all dreadlocks, so insanely awesome.
But most importantly, community builder, pacifist, homless helping, hippie, Green, CHRISTIAN!


He changed my life. www.thesimpleway.org. Or read his books....I have all of them, borrow them from me :)

Thoughts on Life purpose

The purpose of life is not to be happy - but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all. ~Leo Rosten

Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does. ~William James

Do not commit the error, common among the young, of assuming that if you cannot save the whole of mankind you have failed. ~Jan de Hartog, The Lamb's War

Songs and emotions

This Idea Came from OnemoreMortal, I thought it was a good one:)

When I am.......I listen to......

Blissfully happy:

1. Stumptown; Nickel Creek
2. Forever; Chris Brown

Depressed:

1. Curl up and Die; Reliant K
2. Home; Michael Buble

Longing:

1. Fireflies; Owl City
2. Kokomo; Beachboys

Un-Motivated:

1. Waka Waka (this time for Africa); Shakira
2. Starstruk; 3oh!3

Romantic/tense:

(I tend to listen to Romanic stuff when I’m stressed….)

1.Tujh Mein Rab Dikhta Hai; Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi Soundtrack

(Translation: I see God in you)

2. You’ll be in my heart; Phil Collins

3. When you say you love me; Josh Groben

Deeply upset:

1. My Deliverer is Coming; Rich Mullins

Self-Conscious:

1. You are a child of mine; Mark Shultz
2. Fingerprints of God; Steven Curtis Chapman

Inpatient:

1. My Life; Billy Joel
2. Born To Fly: Sarah Evens

Artistic:

1. Sullen Girl; Fiona Apple
2. Tea for the Tillerman; Cat Stevens

What are yours? Send me a link when you post yours!

Observations of a homeschooler

Walking around the local HS Co-op you will see many families:

The Geniuses. Bobby Genuis solved string theory, Ofcourse-we-don't-have-a-TV, your kid says "its a Birdy" theirs says "That's an African Sparrow".

The NOT-real- homeschoolers. They let their kids (gasp)read Harry Potter, watch Disney, Susie Not-real wears holster (or one of those new fandagled brand names). There are only two children

The Rabbits. There is a little Rabbit child in every one of your classes, and there are three about your age, many of them are adopted. Did you hear Mrs. Rabbit is expecting?

The Marines. All the kids are dressed alike, in blue Polo and khaki pants, the mother wears a jean skirt,children who refuse to skip chapel

The Religious. Completely bible based curriculum, Mathew, Mark, and Luke Religious can beat you in a debate about evolution....and will (even if you have already explained that you too are a creationist).
The Beginners. They have every one's report card and transcripts up-to-date, they have bought a brand new science kit they will never use, keep asking questions like "does this count for credit?", they have scheduled class times, and tests.

The Hermits. You will not see them at Co-op, they home-church.....you are not really sure how you met them.

The Atheists. You might not know it now, but they are there. Letting their children lerk around your sweet christian ones. They are Vegetarians and......Evolutionists.

Fellow homeschoolers: have I missed any?
Everyone else: Is does public school have its "types" too?

Poor Esme....Poor Gwen

Today Esme (my Doxie) is trapped in the kitchen. This has been accomplished by propping a card board box at each entrance. She is not pleased. I feel slightly guilty since I really should let her out and pay attention to her. Instead, however, I am writing this blog.

Sometimes I feel as if I, myself, were trapped in the Kitchen of life....held back by my own card board boxes (flimsy at best....but indestructible for me). And the Higher power I talk to so often .....is just checking his facebook.

Well I believe that you all have suffered enough by my absence, I'm back.


Since we talked last:

I quit my job.....

I got a puppy......

and nothing else.......

Hence the lack of posts:)

If you have any brilliant ideas or pressing questions you think I should address in the future....please by my guest.

What Gwendolyn thinks about on monday morings

"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars"

-Whoever said this obviously wasn't "shooting" for a science degree

(The moon is very.... very.... far away from the stars)

Goals are tricky things

It should be obvious to all of you that although I like to make goals, unfortunately I seldom see them through. Like my goal to draw everyday this month….haven’t. Even. Started.

Accordingly, I did a little soul searching trying to figure out what makes our Gwendolyn tick (and what, in turn, makes me yawn). I made a list of things I have actually accomplished

• Snapping with both hands equally loud
• Blowing bubbles (chewing gum) this took me kind of a long time
• Unwrapping a “Starburst” with my mouth really gross learning curve let me tell you
• Curling my lip like Elvis from Dallas to Memphis…. approximately eight hours of looking out the window and trying to curl my lip…. Nevertheless, I can do it! (but only on one side lol)
• Reading “more” this one has been a slow and steady climb. I already like to read, but the past few years I really kicked it up a notch (this year alone I have read twenty-four ½ books!)
• Try everything once (both evil and benign) I plead the fifth. I will leave it up to your wild imaginations exactly what I have tried
• Travel eleven countries, three continents…..
  

I’m sure there are more but those are all I can think of for now. The common factors: Time, Perseverance, room for creativity, starts with a dare of some kind, fun that makes the work worth while, and I just wanted to do it ( I never actually made it into a "goal").

Hell hath no "furry" like a woman scorned

Well, its one thing to be scorned by the male of our unpredictable species. I have had my share of disappointing men....hmmmm....there was "piano man" who spent all his time with me, but ended up asking out my best friend, there was "computer geek boy" who asked me to go out sometime and then disappeared off the face of the planet (only to call me months later to inform me that he was locked in a fridge at work and could I come get him out).....ah....no.., and most recently there was "Turtle guy" who gave me his number and his email and then never followed up when I called him.....what a looser!

Still these slights are trivial compared to the the boy who stood me up this morning.........Jake, our lab/husky! I decided to spend the wee hours outside playing with him before I got ready for work. He let me pet him for maybe two minutes before hightailing it back to the house....humpfh. Sigh.
You know its bad when the dog doesn't even crave your attention.......

~Hope deferred makes the heart sick~

~

There once was a girl: Bonnie Lou

Who wanted to go to SAGU

but she has no money

and (no) its not funny

What is our young hero to do?

She decided on art classes this year

but she was still queasy with fear

her heart full of strife

from her dead social life

her future was more than unclear.

So perhaps my dear readers you'd lend

her a shoulder, a hug, or a friend

for don't you all see

that that bonnie is me

so thanks in advance and THE END.

August Challenge!

This my friends shall be the month of the devastatingly devoted drawing diva!
But before I get into details lets look at last month's:
Teeth.
It started out really great but slowly went down hill (isn't that how it always goes?). I always brushed my teeth (I'm not THAT gross) but the black walnut started irritating my mouth after a week or two (It is pretty strong stuff). That in turn made it hard to floss. My mouth healed up but I still didn't take the time to floss some nights. Also I had a little trouble brushing in the morning, when are you supposed to do that anyway? Right when you get up? or after you eat? I aways eat when I'm headed out the door, so it never worked out. It ended up being almost lunch time before I remembered most days.
So I'll give myself a C+ on that one.

OK so on with August.

1. Do something artistic everyday(more than just doodling during meetings).
2. Try to use different mediums ( pastel, charcoal, paint etc...)
3. At least ten minutes a day
4. Have fun with it (More important than you might think).

Whoo Hoo!

***

I have been a less than perfectly attentive blogger this week thanks to an unfortunate meeting with an SUV on Hwy 35. Thank you everyone for your prayers and concern

Monday morning Poem

More About People

When people aren't asking questions
They're making suggestions
And when they're not doing one of those
They're either looking over your shoulder or stepping on your toes
And then as if that weren't enough to annoy you
They employ you.
Anybody at leisure Incurs everybody's displeasure.
It seems to be very irking
To people at work to see other people not working,
So they tell you that work is wonderful medicine,
Just look at Firestone and Ford and Edison,
And they lecture you till they're out of breath or something
And then if you don't succumb they starve you to death or something.
All of which results in a nasty quirk:
That if you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work!

~Ogden Nash

Conflict of interests

Questions I ask myself at the end of the day:

Was my desire to____ greater than my desire to_____today?

Please God: Please myself

Eat right and feel good: binge

Save my money: spend my money

Give: be selfish

be kind and helpful: avoid others

......Et Cetrea, Et Cetrea

To be cliche......."an unexamined life is not worth living"~Socrates

Things I'm learning from working In Dallas

• The comic strip "Dilbert" gets more amusing the longer you work at an office
  
• Copy machines are like willful children
  
• Co-workers are also like willful children
  
• While its OK to push ahead when exiting an airplane you have to wait for everyone in front of you when exiting a bus. (this gets old real quick let me tell you!)
  
• It is NOT normal for older male co-workers to hang around your desk and sometimes its considered sexual harassment (go figure).
  
• Sometimes homeless people pee on the street in front of your building.
  
• Sometimes homeless people eat out of trashcans in front of you
• You still shouldn't give them money (this is so hard for me!)
  
• Never wear heels when you have to walk four blocks in the middle of summer in the city in Texas
  
• There is always unhealthy food to be had in the break room if you want it.
  
• Elevators hate me
• Stairwells are scary
  
• Cubicles are soul crushing
• But office supplies are fun! (so are pay checks)
• Two bedroom apartments down town cost $400,000 (and those are the ugly ones)
• If you ride the bus you are a middle-aged, over-weight, white woman or poor. --I have yet to see an urban hipster, obvious tree-hugger, or business executive ---TV is misleading us!
• There are more kinds of paper than you could ever imagine! Cardstock, hole punched, color paper (not to be confused with colored paper), recycled etc.....

I am so thankful to have a job, I really am.

What did you learn at your first real job?

Poem for a Monday morning

"If Rabbit was bigger,
And fatter, And stronger-
Or bigger than Tigger-
If Tigger was smaller,
Then Tigger's bad habit
Of bouncing at Rabbit
Would matter no longer-
If Rabbit was taller".

~A.A. Milne

Kung Fu Master!

So I've been working on my Kung Fu skills this week and I'm exhausted. I'm working on my staff fighting so I get to wield a giant pole (It makes me feel pretty dangerous). We also did some Tiger forms last night (rawr!).I love it, but like I said, I'm beat. On Mon/Wed I go to work and then immediately go to Mansfield for martial arts class--not getting home till nine. This and babysitting for My sister's wonderful family on the other days has pretty much worn me out. Thankfully I get Friday evening off :)

SAGU!--I love story

I found a college! I am so excited....more in a minute..

I have always wanted to go to Patric Henry College in Virgina. It is the IVY league for homeschoolers. And In my mind --the heaven of all schools. So I spent my life up to now thinking lustful, coveting, envious thoughts about this school that I was in desperate to get into.
So what if there was no art program, no sociology programs......who cared...it's full of homeschool celebrities like Brett and Alex Harris and children of HSLD lawyers. My father (who is amazing) builds banjos and I am a hippie, It would NOT have been a good fit. Yet, I would have willingly flung myself into that world of lawyers and congressmen in training.....just to be part of such a regal group of people. I was in love. Did I mention the reading list? yes there is a reading list about a mile long JUST TO GET IN THE DOORS! The academic quality is extremely important to me and It only strengthened my infatuation.
But alas it wasn't meant to be (God is one smart cookie I tell you!).
I couldn't get in (I wasn't smart enough) and I couldn't pay for it (not even close)
.....so I told myself to forget it, move on.

However, I secretly thought I should be at PHC just the same. I never was able to get to the point of loving any other school. UT Tyler just can't compare to Christian and highly educated. Infact it can't compare to much of anything. I assumed that I would never love college again. Just as I left the High school scene early, I anticipated never going back to live at any campus.

But the most amazing thing happened! I went to Visit Southwestern Assemblies of God. Then I realized that what I though was unique to Patric Henry was in reality something I could find elsewhere (maybe even more so). It was a Chrisitan environment, geared to help you grow spirituality while you learn...24 hours of mandatory Bible classes (YAY!), and a degree I can really sink my teeth into! The school is more missions focused and down to earth then PHC and I don't feel like everyone on campus will be a republican (that's a good thing). The admissions counselor I saw was excellent and the Staff was friendly. The campus is close to home (Waxahachie) so I know the area back and forth. But the thing that was the most amazing was the peace I felt walking on campus....unlike any other school I have visited.
I still can't pay for it.....but I think with some scrimping and pinching I can make it. I am in love again and it feels great!


P.S. I learned to use links today...can you tell?

Monthly Challenge-July

Hello everyone,

Today is July first and it is time, once again, for my over zealous perfectionistic side to take over. This will be the month of the Tantalizing Toothys.

Goal: Beautify those crunchers till they give people sun burns with every smile.

1. Brush teeth twice a day. I am very good about brushing at night, but sometimes in the morning I just don't make it there....Now is the time to change that.



2. Floss at night. Again I do this sometimes..but not every time like I should.



3. Black walnut at night. This miracle remedy not only whitens teeth naturally, it boosts your immune system at the same time!..the only down side is that it's a little bitter.
   

So there you have it. The idea is to do this every day No Matter What! Even if I forget and go to bed...I have to get up. Even if *GASP* I don't feel like it!

So what are YOU waiting for? Whats your July monthly challenge?

*when chooseing a challenge I sugesst nothing weightloss related as this tends to become a burden. This is suposed to be fun remember!

Rant of frustration

Sometimes I just want find a cave on the side of a mountain where I can curl up and sleep for the rest of my life. I am so jealous of people who feel like doing things.....like skipping, or walking, or anything but sleeping.
The Gluten free diet was SUPPOSED to take care of it. The dairy free was supposed to help! I should want to go places, get back into my art, and have fun. What else can I possibly be allergic to? What am I doing wrong?
I have lots of things I want to do with my life...way too many to actually do. That's OK, I understand that, but when I feel like I can't do ANY of them I want to cry.

Oh I am so thankful that I have food and shelter, both arms, all my hair, and no cancer. I am thrilled that I have access to an education, the Internet, and medicine. I'm ecstatic that I get to buy every thing I need and most of what I want.......but I STILL want to feel good (is that so wrong?).

Weekend update with Gwen.

VROOOM ERK, VROOM ERK, VROOM ERK......If you live I'm my neighborhood I'm sorry. I finally got a car. And its a standard. All day yesterday I drove up and down the driveway trying to develop a loving relationship with the clutch.......HA!
Its fun though, learning new things is amazing and its added some much needed excitement to my otherwise uninteresting summer existence.
So my weekend consisted of:
*Driving practice (of course)
*Titanic the musical
*Indian Yoga
*Reading (Robert Heinlein....yes that's science fiction....:)
*Trying to make my tortoise, Rosyvelt, eat!!
and *shopping for yummy GF products!
Even my boring life is pretty interesting.....why do I feel so deprived?

OMGosh! Slow Down!

Sometime it seems my progression to adulthood is more of a crawl....or a scoot.....or maybe just a lean. Its like watching paint dry..or grass grow.....Its like paining grass and watching it dry as it grows!

I want to be a "big kid" so bad sometimes!! Mostly when it comes to moving out on my own. WHEN WILL IT HAPPEN.....I DON'T WANT TO BE THE CRAZY CAT LADY!!

Yet, days like yesterday when I overdraw my checking account or "forget" that something I used to love has gluten in it, I can see that I really need to be going slower....Take my time and breathe. I am a promise, I am a possibility...And I am growing up at an incredible rate already.

"I know the plans that I have for your says the LORD".....and sometimes I want to you stay put and learn.

Do you have a problem with out running your growth curve (grown ups too)?

Thankfulness

I started the GF (Gluten free)/DF (Dairy free)/ Soy free life style on the thirteenth of this month (hmmm I'm not too superstitious) . Since then I have noticed an incredible amount of clarity in my thinking that even Prozac can't give me. It's as if, for the first time, I comprehend my own power. First and foremost I am surprised at the peace that I have eating this way. I am truly thankful for all the food I am allowed to eat. The key: I'm not doing this to loose weight.....if i was it wouldn't work. I want to feel like doing cartwheels, and getting up at god-forsaken hours every morning! I love my adventures and my little challenges for myself and this one tops them all. That's why I know I'll stick with it for sure.
My new favorite food ( so far ): Coconut milk yogurt.......so good.
Least favorite: rice tortillas......tastes like wet cardboard....terrible with a capital Yuck!

To start somewhere--ready or not?

I am incredibly conceited.

I am also (I hope) at least amusing.....if not incredibly interesting. Therefore I am asking that you would be gracious unto me and continue reading until I get a handle on this new fangled tech.......